Hip Hop Monday #5: Super Bowl Edition

It’s Super Bowl week. In case you are only casually acquainted with the NFL, I will explain why this is significant. It is significant because it is the best. 2010’s best teams play each other, famous people do boring stuff for TV purposes, exciting things happen and someone wins a world championship. This year, the teams are the Pittsburgh Steelers and the Green Bay Packers. Here are some rap songs I like with football references.

This is Wiz Khalifa, whose thing used to be that he smoked a lot of weed but whose thing is now shifting towards being very popular and rapping over flipped euro-dance. Wiz is from Pittsburgh, where all of the major sports teams wear black and yellow. He put this song out in September and it was a hit, but now the Steelers are in the Super Bowl. Pittsburgh now listens to Black and Yellow exclusively. The following is a list of Black and Yellow spin-offs in which other rappers rap the colours of their favourite teams over the beat to Black and Yellow.

Fabulous – White and Navy (New York Yankees, baseball)
Paypa – Black and Red (Chicago Bulls, basketball)
Bailey – Black and Orange (San Francisco Giants, baseball)
Marquee T – Black and Purple (TCU Horned Frogs, college football)
Snoop Dogg, The Game and YG – Purp and Yellow (LA Lakers, basketball)
Pizzle and Prophetic – Green and Yellow (Green Bay Packers, football)
Irv Da Phenom – Red and Yellow (Kansas City Chiefs, football)
B Double E – Red and Blue (Kansas Jayhawks, college basketball)
P.L. – Blue and Yellow (Michigan Wolverines, college football)
Marcus Manchild – Red and Yellow (Houston Rockets, basketball)
DC – Gold and Garnet (Florida State Seminoles, football)
Kazer and 2 Clean – Black and Silver (San Antonio Spurs, basketball)
Vinny from Jersey Shore – Black and Guido (Guidos and black girls, sex)
Latin Kings – Black and Gold (Latin Kings, gang)
Demize – Blue and Orange (Chicago Bears, football)
D-Pryde – Blue and Purple (Toronto Blue Jays, baseball, Toronto Maple Leafs, hockey)

There are more. Those are some of the ones that YouTube rappers were smart enough to edit into the Wikipedia entry for Black and Yellow. For fairness, here’s Green Bay’s version. It’s less good, but there are less than 1,500 African-Americans in Green Bay, Wisconsin according to the last census, so if precedent is anything to go by, their scene can’t be that strong.

Wu Tang slam tracks like quarterback sacks from LT (Laurence Taylor, a Hall of Famer New York Giants linebacker who is now on the sex offenders register. Wu Tang would not have known that this was going to happen.)

Danny Brown blows on kush the colour of a Minnesota Viking. Which is purple.

Yelawolf wears Alabama Crimson Tide sweat pants to bed, presumably because he is a fan of ‘Bama football. Yes, Crimson Tide.

NWA were into the Raiders, who moved out of LA in the 80s. They want you to bow down to Raiders hats.

Nicki Minaj calls plays, metaphorically, causing bitches to call her “Manning, Eli”, quarterback of the New York Giants. His brother Peyton Manning is broadly considered the superior quarterback, but that doesn’t work when you turn it backwards to force a rhyme.

One of the reasons they call Roc-a-fella “Gang Green” is because they stop your run. The New York Jets, also called Gang Green, do a reasonably good job of stopping the run, statistically third best in 2010’s regular season. Jay-Z also compares his multitasking rapper/exec skills to those of athletic former Steelers quarterback Kordell Stewart.

Eminem gets “as rowdy as Roethlisberger in a bathroom stall” – Ben Roethlisberger is the quarterback of the Pittsburgh Steelers, and has made a habit of getting sexual assault allegations levelled against him.

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